Let’s be really honest here. When your kids are tiny, it feels as if some tiny precious human is permanently attached to you. As your kids get older, there are often many more kids around than you actually get to claim on your taxes. Yet even with all of these people swarming around you asking for attention and help – motherhood can be extremely lonely. Sometimes, you want to cry for those long ago friendships when you had the time and energy to talk for hours about everything and nothing.
Which is why, I was interested when offered the chance to review Never Unfriended: The Secret to Finding and Keeping Lasting Friendships by Lisa-Jo Baker. Could her book help moms create and nurture the friendships they so desperately need and crave?
The book is divided into four main sections with several chapters in each. The sections address our fears, what we can’t do, what we can do and how to get started.
Honestly, this book is a great tutor and/or reminder on basic people and friendship skills. As time goes on, we forget what worked well for us in the past and the mistakes we’ve previously made in our friendships. So instead of using “best friendship practices”, we use our bad habits or don’t do the positive things we should be doing and then wonder why our lives are so empty of friends.
She covers everything from “Live like the Kingdom Is a Co-Op, Not a Competition” to “Stop Trying to Find a Seat at the Popular Table” to “We Can’t Expect Other People to Fill Us Up” and much more. For me though, one of the most valuable areas was covered a couple of different ways. I love that she addresses the lie Satan tells us about our true friends.
The reality is a little part of us is still in Middle School. We don’t think anyone can really like us for who we are. We just aren’t that “special” or “popular”. Yet, in reality most of us have at least one friend who would go to the mat for us. She is just as crazy busy as we are and so some drift has occurred. I love the way Baker talks about how our minds falsely process this friendship – especially in the middle of the night (or when we are at our lowest anyway). A text which goes unanswered for a day can’t possible be for reasons that have nothing to do with how much that person loves and values us. Instead, Satan thinks of all kinds of reasons why we need to walk away from that friendship – especially if it’s one that can keep us close to God.
Even if you are in a good friendship place right now, you may want to read this book. We all need to be reminded regularly how to nurture friendships both old and new. So read this book and then go have coffee with that friend. You are probably closer than you realize.
A copy of this book was given to me for free in exchange for my honest review. An affiliate link is included for your convenience.