The homework wars are real. Parents don’t like homework any more than their kids do. There are articles debating the importance of homework versus free time, yet many teachers still assign quite a bit of homework. As someone with a background in education – who also had a child in public school for five years – I can testify that some of her homework assignments added no educational value and were both annoying and time consuming.
It can be tempting to “help” your kids to speed up the process. Or perhaps your child has a borderline grade and good homework grades will bump them into the higher grade. Or maybe you are just super competitive and want your child’s projects to always be the best in the class. The temptation to actually do your child’s homework or just give them the answers can be overwhelming.
Unfortunately, there are two major moral issues with doing your child’s homework. The first is that it is lying. Cheating at its core is lying. You are trying to make a teacher believe your child completed work on their own that you did all or a large part of. That is a lie and we know how much God hates lies. The second moral issue is that you are helping undermine the teacher’s authority. The New Testament is clear about respecting authority figures when their commands are not forcing us to disobey God.
Teachers expect parents to give their children some help with their homework. They know that parents who don’t help have children who struggle more in school. So what should you do? When does helping, cross the line and become cheating?
- When you give your kids the answers instead of teaching them how to find the answer. Teachers often want parents to look for mistakes on completed homework so students can learn how to do the problem correctly. Your kids aren’t learning anything when you give them the correct answer, Take a few extra minutes to walk through the problem with them, helping them find the error and correct it with only prompts from you like, “What should you do next?”
- On creative projects, ask questions that encourage their creativity or give broad suggestions. Instead of saying “you should build a building using an empty paper towel roll and drawing windows on it every half inch”, try asking them what things you have in your recycling bin that they could use…. or what could they do to the item they have chosen to make it look like a real building.
- It’s okay to give children with motor skill issues a little help (if that is not a learning objective for the project), but assist, don’t do it for them. Put your hand over their hand to help them move their hands in the ways needed. Don’t just grab the scissors and cut it out yourself.
- Remember, the finished project should look like a child completed it. If your child normally uses one syllable words when writing at school and their paper comes back with three and four syllable words – they better be able to explain how they found those words and what they mean. Likewise, if a creative project comes back looking like it was designed by an architect and your child can’t cut a straight line during the school day, the teacher will know you provided more help than you should have done.
- When in doubt, ask the teacher. Some teachers, for example, encourage students to find someone to help edit papers for mistakes. Others want the students to catch all of their errors themselves. Make sure you understand what the school and the teacher allow as appropriate outside help before helping your child.
Your kids’ teachers want you to be engaged with them and their homework, Just make sure you aren’t actually helping them cheat.