So many parents believe the years when their kids are home are somehow “wasted”. That the world outside of their home is more interesting, more fulfilling and just better in general. What if though, we realized our homes are a sacred ground of sorts as God entrusts to raise the next generation?
That’s the premise of the book Sacred Ground Sticky Floors by Jami Amermine. The author focuses more though on the idea that we should embrace our failures, because God loves us “royally”. Actually, this is just another in what is becoming a parenting sub-genre – the “let’s not worry about being better parents, or how we can help our kids grow deep spiritual roots, let’s just celebrate we are all a hot mess and…God love us.”
Don’t get me wrong. There are no perfect parents. No matter how hard you try, you will make mistakes. But as anyone can tell you who has a broken story a few generations back, it’s crucial someone breaks the cycle and each generation continues to build on that. That my friends, takes work. A lot of work.
I’m not one to second guess specific mother’s choices. I don’t live in their world and can’t speak to all of the dynamics involved in their choices. I do believe since the author has sold her story though, it is open as a bit of a case study. She has at least three children to whom she gave birth – one with hearing impairment and other issues, one with defiant behavior (to the extent the police are involved at times) and one gifted child. Then she adds several foster and adopted children – all with their own issues because of the brokenness in their homes of origin. At the same time she evidently gets an advanced degree, writes books, travels to promote them and speak and who knows what else. I kept wanting to call her and beg her to take something off of her plate.
Which at the end of the day is the problem I have with every book in this “let’s celebrate our mess” genre. Ultimately, what the parent wants or thinks they need comes ahead of what is in the best interest of the children. They keep making choices that leave no margin for error. They put themselves in situations when exhaustion is the norm. Then they claim the chaos that ensues is amazing and wonderful and God will fix our messes. Maybe He will, but a lot of children are being hurt in the process.
Some parents have no choice. Their lives and parenting journey give them no choices, but hoping to survive. For most of us though, there are plenty of options. We should have more Christian parents encouraging us to make wise choices, limit what we try to do and focus on what it truly crucial. Not entire books that encourage us to keep making whatever mistakes we might be making and in fact, celebrate the chaos those choices may be causing in the lives of our children.
Ultimately, I don’t fault this author. She is merely writing what she knows. The book reads like a reality show. I question the publishers who choose to publish books that don’t call us to be the best parents we can be for our kids. The Bible discusses grace, but it also calls us to do our best. Somehow we have lost that part of the equation.
This book was given to me in exchange for my honest review. An affiliate link is included for your convenience.