Bridging the Generations

Bridging the Generations - Parenting Like Hannah
Sticking Points by Haydn Shaw

Conversations between grandparents and grandchildren are often hysterically funny. The older generation still tells stories featuring typewriters and record albums, while the younger ones are texting and discussing the pros and cons of the latest gadgets. Sometimes there are more puzzled looks and “huh’s?” than actual communication. It’s almost as if they are from different countries.

That’s the premise of the book Sticking Points: How to Get 4 Generations Working Together in the 12 Places They Come Apart by Haydn Shaw. Shaw’s premise is that most of the tensions in the workplace and our homes is because of our generational issues. We feel like we aren’t being heard by those in older and younger generations, because in reality we are speaking a foreign language to them.

Although aimed primarily at problems generational differences cause in the workplace, there is a lot for the parent and teen child to glean as well. Shaw defines the types of problems in our homes and workplaces that are actually caused because of generational differences. He spends a lot of time attempting to help readers understand why the other generations think and act the way they do.

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The Danger of Doing Good

The Danger of Doing Good - Parenting Like Hannah
The Spiritual Danger of Doing Good by Peter Greer and Anna Haggard

Part of being an effective parent is knowing how to be an effective leader. We normally don’t think of parenting that way, but when you analyze it, you are attempting to lead these little ones to follow God. As a result I am drawn as much or more to books on leadership than I am to books on parenting.

When I was asked to review Peter Greer‘s book, The Spiritual Danger of Doing Good I was intrigued. What angle would he take? Did he have some sort of axe to grind?

I ended up loving this book. Personally I believe it is a must read for everyone. Whether you are a leader, a parent, attempting to raise a child with strong leadership skills or “just” a follower of leaders, this book has information you need to know and thoroughly digest.

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For Parents Struggling With Their Own Childhoods

For Parents Struggling With Their Own Childhoods - Parenting Like Hannah
How We Love Our Kids by Milan and Kay Merkovich

One of the parenting mistakes I see the most is parents not taking the time to really listen to what their children have to say. For Christian parents, getting to know your child through listening, is especially crucial. What they tell you and share with you will give you glimpses into their hearts. As Christian parents, it is really the heart we are trying to mold towards God. It is almost impossible to mold what we don’t know.

One of the reasons parents don’t really listen to their children is that they don’t know how. Many current parents were not heard by their own parents. In fact, there are still many people alive today who believe “children should be seen and not heard”.  If your parents never really listened to you or you were raised in a dysfunctional or abusive environment, how do you learn what to do differently?

Milan and Kay Merkovich may just have the help you need in their book, How We Love Our Kids. (You can read the first chapter here for free.) They have analyzed parents and have discovered five main types of parenting styles. Each of the styles has its own ways of not giving children the attention and real listening they need. Sadly, the children are often blamed for the resulting conflicts when it is the parenting style that is causing many of the issues.

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Moving on From Mom Guilt

Moving On From Mom Guilt - Parenting Like Hannah
Moving Forward by Everett L. Worthington, Jr.

Our daughter was five years old and having her kindergarten physical, when I requested a flu shot for her. The pediatrician looked at me somewhat condescendingly and informed me my daughter most likely wouldn’t catch it and if she did, it would be a mild case that would build up her immunity. In my gut, I knew he was wrong, but was intimidated enough to obey him. Guess whose child got a horrible case of the flu with after effects that went on for weeks? (Guess whose child has had a flu shot every year since!)

Guilt seems to be a natural part of mothering. We read an article and second guess our selves. Little old ladies are constantly telling us to put the socks and shoes back on our babies before something horrid happens. (Not that I’m bitter or anything, but you try keeping shoes on a baby!) And then there are those times when we really do make mistakes – some of them even rather serious at times.

Guilt can freeze you as a mother. You become afraid to make decisions for fear of making a mistake and suffering more guilt. If your struggle with guilt is severe enough, it can paralyze you to the extent you are incapable of parenting at all.

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For Christian Teens Who Want to be Popular

For Christian Teens Who Want to Be Popular - Parenting Like Hannah
Popular by Tindell Baldwin

Funny thing about being in high school. A few years ago, I went back to my old high school. Since I had lived out of state for years and this was pre-Facebook, I had lost touch with almost everyone. As we stood around reminiscing about our past, I had an epiphany. Almost everyone in high school thinks they are not popular!

As I heard people I would have identified as some of the most popular kids in our class talk about being teased or not feeling like they fit in, I realized maybe the whole popular thing is more about learning to be comfortable in your own skin. Perhaps it is about realizing there is no “normal” person and being different can really be just great (in healthy, godly ways of course). Maybe our shared angst was actually more about discovering who we were than about how popular we thought we were.

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