Have you ever seen a celebrity apologize for something horrible? Sometimes they look more like a five year old being forced to apologize to a sibling! Or have you ever experienced someone who “apologizes” by saying “I’m sorry if I did anything that made you mad.”? Really? Apologies are meant to begin repairing relationships, but most apologies do more harm to the relationship than good.
Jacob, oddly enough, was one of the better examples of a great apology we have in the Bible. If you remember, Jacob had tricked Esau into giving up his birthright and then tricked Isaac into giving him Esau’s blessing. I would imagine there was quite a bit of bad blood when they parted ways. Years later, Jacob decided it was time to apologize.
If you read the entire story in Genesis (chapters 32-33), you will see Jacob didn’t just say “Sorry” and kick the dirt like a petulant five year old. He didn’t say “I apologize if I did anything to make you mad.” (Seriously, you don’t know what you did to make Esau mad?) Instead, he had a multi part apology that took several days to execute. Yet in the end, it restored their relationship.
So what did Jacob do to apologize? (Note: Gary Chapman does a great job in describing the languages of apology which gave me the idea for this post. Read the review for his newest book on Friday!) What do you need to teach your children about a great apology?
If your children can speak, you probably realize they consider you and anyone else close to your age “old”. I laugh now, because I will talk to friends from home and they will mention someone is “getting older”. In my memory, that person had to be at least in their 60’s or 70’s when I was a child. Inevitably, I will ask “What?! Isn’t she over 100 by now?” Usually, I realize the “old” person had actually been only in their 30’s or 40’s when I was little!
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This is one post series I never thought I would have to write. I remember having friends throughout my life. Some relationships were stronger and healthier than others perhaps, but I don’t remember particularly struggling to meet people and become friends with good, kind girls and guys.