Category: Bible Study

Tips for Teaching Your Kids to Love Their Enemies

Children and teens are learning how to navigate the world around them. One of the most difficult areas of life for them to master is interpersonal relationships. In fact, most of us adults are still trying to be more loving and godly in our relationships with others, too. If your children are old enough to spend time with people their age, you have probably already seen them struggle with the conflicts that often occur in relationships.

Perhaps the most difficult of relationships for Christian young people to understand and live out in their lives is the idea of loving and praying for your enemies. We live in a world that increasingly encourages everyone to destroy not only enemies, but anyone who thinks differently from us on a wide range of topics. In a world that believes it is tolerant, your children will be exposed to people who counsel them to do things that are far from loving.

So what are some things you can do to raise children who are counter cultural and love their enemies as commanded by God? Here are some of our top tips on the subject.

  • Teach your children God’s views on the topic and discuss it regularly. Your children will struggle to obey God and love their enemies if they don’t realize or remember that it is a command from God. I met a young man recently who had grown up in a war torn area of the world. Even though his father had been a soldier and watched as the enemy burned their family home to the ground, he regularly reminded his children that not only did he expect them to avoid saying anything negative about the enemy country and its people, but he also told them he would hold them accountable if he ever heard them doing so. Loving your enemy needs to be part of your family DNA as well as a command from God.
  • Define enemy for them. An enemy is not someone who disagrees with them or holds an opinion that is different than theirs on a topic. Enemies are people who actively seek to do us harm. They need to learn that the word enemy is a very strong way of describing someone in a negative way and it should be used very rarely in describing another person.
  • When they do believe they have an enemy, encourage them to pray for that person, but also make a point of your entire family praying for them as well. I believe God commands us to pray for our enemies because it is very difficult to simultaneously hate someone and pray for their benefit. Our brains don’t like contradictions, so praying for their enemies will make it more difficult for them to actively hate them. If your entire family prays for the enemy of one member, you also are reminding your children that your family is a team for God, not just individuals who happen to live together.
  • Don’t forget to teach your children the rest of the command. Luke 6:27-28 also says to do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you and to not just pray for, but also love your enemies. Discuss and find ways to do good to any enemies your family has. Discuss what it means to bless those who curse you. How can your family do that on a regular basis also? With so many good things your kids will be doing for their enemies, it will be difficult for hate to take root in their own hearts.
  • Be empathetic about the pain your children’s enemies cause. I think Psalms shows us that it is natural to be hurt and even angry in the immediate aftermath of an enemy’s blows. Show empathy for that pain, but also put a time limit on it. Continuing to revisit the same grievance over and over is what can lead to sinning in one’s anger.
  • An enemy may never become a friend, but encourage your children to try and thaw relations when possible. It can be extremely difficult to act kindly towards an enemy. Most children, teens – and even adults – either try to avoid the person or snap back with their own anger. In potentially dangerous situations, avoidance may indeed be wise, but for the average childhood enemy situation, encourage your child to see if they can improve the overall relationship even a bit. Frenemy wouldn’t be a term if it were impossible to at least broker a truce of sorts.
  • Set a good example. If you are always criticizing your own enemies – or even worse – plotting revenge, you cannot expect your children to love their enemies. Setting a good example will make it easier for them to understand how loving your enemies is done.

It may never be easy for your children to love their enemies, but it is possible. They will need your help though in learning how to do it. Coaching them through the process will help them become who God created them to be.

Fun Way to Teach Your Kids How to Fact Check Religious Statements

When it comes to God, Jesus, Christianity and the Bible there is a lot of information your children can access that is not only inaccurate, but may even be purposely designed to undermine their growing faith. With a generation who can find the “answers” to any question in seconds, the internet can be a spiritual mine field.

Part of the answer is to teach your children how to fact check anything they read or hear by what is written in the Bible. While just telling them that multiple times might be simpler, having a fun interactive family devotional may make a better impact. Begin by looking at familiar Bible story from a different angle.

In Genesis 27, we find the familiar story of Jacob deceiving Isaac in order to receive Jacob’s blessing. Instead of telling the story from the perspective of Jacob and Esau, ask your children what Isaac believed was true when Jacob came to him dressed as Esau. How do they think he felt when he realized he had been tricked? Ask them to think of a time when they thought something was true, only to find out later it was not. What problems did it cause them when they believed the lie?

Explain that sometimes when we believe a lie, we are merely embarrassed when we discover the truth. Other times, the lie can cause major negative consequences in our lives when we believe it. Tell them this is especially true when we believe lies about God, Jesus, Christianity and the Bible. Those lies are dangerous because Satan can use them to weaken our faith if we are not careful.

Explain that sometimes the ”deceptions”aren’t on purpose. The person may have remembered the details wrong or misunderstood something. Even though the person did not mean to deceive us, it can still cause problems.

Other times though, people purposefully tell us lies because they want us to stop believing in God and obeying Him. Their motives may vary, but Satan will use their lies to try and convince God is not worth worshipping and obeying. If we believe those lies, we can suffer catastrophic negative consequences.

The easiest example to find is often in illustrations of Noah’s Ark. Point out the description of the Ark and the number of animals in it. Ask them to look at the illustration and find the errors in it. (Usually illustrations have too many windows and show only one pair of every type of animal.) While this is an example of people not remembering to fact check before creating their art, there are other examples around us everywhere – some of which are more sinister.

How you continue the activity depends upon the age of your children. Little ones can look at other illustrations of Bible stories or watch Bible story videos for children. Have them point out not only the mistakes, but the places where the artist added information that is not in the Bible. (Sometimes that doesn’t change the meaning of the story, but other times it can change one’s understanding of it.)

With older children and teens, you might explore Google searches for religious questions and discover how many answers are totally different from what the Bible teaches. Have them watch normal content and listen for statements characters make about God, Jesus, Christianity and the Bible that are wrong. Point out that often these errors are stated by characters that are supposedly Christian to make them more believable.

End the devotional by reminding them to check out everything anyone says to them about faith matters by comparing it to scripture. You can also have follow up times when you teach them how to find the information they need in the Bible quickly. Teaching your kids to fact check every religious statement they hear or read can prevent them from believing one of Satan’s lies.

Fun Resurrection Family Devotional

I am reposting this annual family favorite to give you time to gather the ingredients together before this weekend. Although designed for Easter, this devotional can be done any time of the year.

Resurrection Cookies are a great way to review the story of Jesus’ death with your children. I got the recipe from one of my neighbors years ago and suspect it is one of those that has been passed around all over the country. I would love to credit the inventor, but have no idea who that would be. We did this every year the Saturday night before Easter as one of our family traditions when our daughter was younger.

You will need a Bible, preferably an NIrV version for younger children. Preheat the oven to 300* and make sure it has reached 300* before you start cooking. Your bowl and beaters need to be grease free for this to work well. We have used pasteurized egg whites and they work fine although it is more difficult to keep the yolk out of the whites. It is best to do this right before the children go to bed, but aren’t so sleepy they won’t enjoy it. It can take up to thirty minutes at night and about five or ten minutes the next morning.

For ingredients you will need: 1 cup of whole pecans, 1 teaspoon of vinegar (apple cider vinegar), 2 egg whites, 1 cup sugar and a pinch of salt. I am numbering each step with its scripture to make the recipe easier to follow with your children.

1. Read John 19:1-3. Place the pecans in a large baggie and seal it. As your children beat the pecans with a rolling pin, discuss how Jesus was beaten by the soldiers after his arrest.

2. Read John 19:28-30. Allow the children to smell the vinegar and taste it if they are brave enough! As the vinegar is placed in the bowl explain that when Jesus got thirsty on the cross and asked for something to drink, he was given vinegar.

3. Read John 10:10-11. Add egg whites to the vinegar. Explain to your children that eggs represent life. Discuss how by Jesus giving his life up on the cross, he gave us the hope of eternal life.

4. Read Luke 23:27. Sprinkle a little salt in each child’s hand. Let them taste it. Put a pinch in the bowl. The salt represents the tears of those who loved Jesus when they realized he was dead.

5. Read Psalm 34:8 and John 3:16. Add the sugar. Tell your children that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because he loves us. He wants us to become Christians and spend eternity with him in Heaven.

6. Read John 3:1-3. Beat the mixture on high (stand mixers work best) for 12-15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed (when you turn off the mixer and lift the beaters it leaves stiff little mountain tops). Discuss with your children how the color white stands for purity. Jesus’ blood allows us the chance to be cleansed of our sins and be pure again.

7. Read Matthew 27:57-60. Fold in the pecans. Drop the mixture by teaspoonfuls onto a parchment covered cookie sheet. Explain to your child that each mound represents the tomb where Jesus was laid.

8. Read Matthew 27:65-66. Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and turn the oven OFF. Let each child place a piece of tape on the oven door (or roll a large rock in front of it!). Explain how the soldiers sealed the tomb of Jesus.

9. Read John 16:20 and 22.  As you send your children to bed, explain you know they may feel sad about leaving the cookies in the oven over night. Ask them if they can imagine how sad the followers of Jesus must have been when Jesus was sealed in the tomb.

10.  Read Matthew 28:1-9. When your children wake up the next morning, allow them to open the oven and take out the cookies. Have them break open the cookie and see the empty air pocket. Remind them how surprised and excited the followers of Jesus must have been on that first Sunday morning after the cross when they found the empty tomb and realized Jesus was alive.

This is a fun reminder of the resurrection for any time of the year or you can make it an annual tradition. The goal is to create a memorable experience that will place the story of Jesus’ death, burial and resurrection firmly in the minds and hearts of your children.

Fun Passover Family Devotional

As Christians, we often neglect to teach our children about the Jewish holidays found in the Old Testament. Although, we are no longer required to celebrate them as Christians, they do have lessons our children can learn from their purposes and how they pointed the Israelites to the coming Messiah, Jesus.

Passover is perhaps the most obvious Jewish holiday with connections to Christianity. Originally meant to help the Israelites remember each year how God rescued them from slavery in Egypt, the communion service echoes the original Passover feast (the modern Passover meal is more complicated than the one the Israelites ate right before they fled from Egypt). (Make sure you have all of the ingredients you will need before starting the devotional.)

Read or tell your children the story of the first Passover found in Exodus 12. If your children are older, you may also want to read them the story of the Last Supper found in Luke 22:7-38. Ask them the similarities they see between the food in the first Passover and the food Jesus used to institute our communion. Point out that both involved unleavened bread.

Take your children into the kitchen. Mix together 2 cups flour (whole wheat is most authentic, but you can use white flour if you prefer), 3/4 cup water, 2 tablespoons olive oil and 1 teaspoon salt. Divide the dough. Have your children knead it and then make flat, unleavened bread ”loaves”. Bake at 450* (260* C) for ten minutes.

Want to add another interesting element to your bread making? Somewhere along the line, rabbis determined there had to be a time limit on the making of unleavened bread. This is because plain flour and water can begin to have a minor leavening effect without yeast after eighteen minutes. Although this was never commanded by God, today observant Jews time from the moment the ingredients are first mixed until the finished bread is removed from the oven. The entire process must take less than eighteen minutes or it is no longer considered unleavened bread. (For older children and teens, this can be the basis of a discussion about the added burdens the Pharisees placed on the people by the time of Jesus and how we must be careful to not do the same.)

For younger children, you may want to explore why the Israelites needed to make unleavened bread instead of ”regular” bread as they were rushing to leave Egypt. Start a recipe of leavened bread at the same time you start your unleavened bread. Choose a recipe that requires the dough to rise twice before baking. Point out that God knew the Egyptians would chase them, so they needed to be ready to leave – and leave quickly- when it was time. Had they waited for bread to rise, it would have slowed them down too much, or they would have left hungry.

As you enjoy your freshly baked bread, discuss what God wants us to remember during communion and compare it to what the Israelites were supposed to remember each year at Passover.

Fun Family Devotional: Stop Playing the Blame Game

“He made me do it!” “It’s not my fault!” “I didn’t have a choice!” Blaming others when bad things happen – especially things that can get one in trouble – is a game that is often learned in childhood. Mind you, it’s not a game that’s taught, like Monopoly, but is learned either by observing others or by accident. If not addressed early, it can become a habit, that when bad enough can cause a separation from God.

The problem with playing the blame game is that it encourages lying and can eventually help the blame shifter develop a victim mindset. It can also lead to blame shifters refusing to repent – because in their minds, no sin is ever their fault. Even if the issue in question is fully the fault of another person, choosing to focus on blaming instead of working to correct the issue can cause the blame shifter to get stuck – never forgiving or moving on. Over time, a victim mindset can leave people stuck in an incident from years past, angry, bitter and any spiritual, emotional or other types of growth hampered because of the amount of time and effort spent ruminating on the past.

So how can you help your children learn to accept responsibility for whatever their part was in a negative situation, while also forgiving those who may have shared the blame (or even been truly totally to blame)? There is a family devotional you can do to launch periodic discussions about blaming others.

Gather your children and tell them the story of King Saul playing the blame game, found in 1 Samuel 13. King Saul wanted to celebrate his army’s victory over the enemy. As part of the celebration, he actually wanted to do something good – thank God with a sacrifice. The Law, however, stated that only a priest like Samuel could actually perform the sacrifice. So Saul waited for Samuel to appear.

Days went by with no sign of Samuel. Finally, King Saul got tired of waiting and did the sacrifice himself. Literally, just as he finished the sacrifice, Samuel finally arrived. Samuel was furious that King Saul had so blatantly broken God’s Law about sacrificing. When he confronted Saul, what did the king do? Blamed everyone else of course!

Now King Saul was not the first, nor the last person to try and blame others for their poor choices or sins. Adam and Eve were the first and people will probably still be trying to blame others for their poor choices until Jesus returns. Notice though how severe the punishment was for Saul’s disobedience. The Kingdom would not be ruled by his family in the future, but by another family. The Bible doesn’t tell us, but one cannot help but wonder if things would have ended differently if King Saul had at least accepted full blame for his sin and repented.

Point out to your children the probable lie in King Saul’s blame game attempt. Saul was king – a king who had successfully led them to victory. Why wouldn’t they wait for Samuel if Saul asked (or told) them to do so? Also note that although it might look like Saul took some responsibility for what happened, notice how it is phrased – “I felt compelled to do so”. Point out that what Saul said is very similar to when we say somebody “made us” do something. Explain that in any situation, we have a choice. We might not like the possible consequences of either option, but there is always a godly option. Even, if like many first century Christians, we find that making the choice to obey God ends up in a bad consequence (prison or death in their case), God still wants us to choose to obey Him.

Explain to your children that the problem with playing the blame game is that we can become so good at it that we don’t even realize we are playing it after awhile. Blaming others for everything bad that happens can become a really bad habit. It can become so bad that we don’t believe we need to be a Christian or repent of our sins, because we are never responsible for making sinful choices.

The first step in breaking the blame game habit is the ability to recognize how easily and often we blame others instead of taking responsibility or working to find solutions. Give each of your children a piece of paper or a little notebook. Explain that for the next week every time they catch someone or themselves trying to blame others instead of taking responsibility for their part of the problem or focusing on blaming someone instead of working to find a solution, they should pay close attention. For each incident, they should record enough information so they can discuss what happened at the end of the week. They can use examples from streaming content, books, newspapers and of course real life. (As the parent, try to capture every example of them or you and your spouse blaming others for something.)

You may want to kick off the exercise by watching a kid’s movie or show that depicts people trying to play the blame game. Help your children identify the incidents as they happen while you watch it together. After it’s finished, discuss any consequences that happened because of characters trying to shift blame (Be sure to point out any unrealistic scenarios that may have also occurred.) This is especially important for younger children who may have a difficult time understanding the concepts you are teaching.

At the end of the week, discuss what everyone observed. Did the exercise make you more aware of how often the blame game is played in our world? Did it make you start to notice how playing the game hurts the blame shifter in the long run? What could people have done differently in some of those situations? How does the blame game relate to God’s commands for us to repent of our sins? Have fun with it, but help them see how blaming others will only hurt them in the long run. (Note: Rare children may overthink this and begin doing the opposite – blaming themselves for things that were not their fault. Work with them to understand the godly balance needed. Taking the blame unnecessarily for others is often not in the other person’s best interest either – as they may need to learn to accept responsibility for their actions, too.)