Summer is just around the corner and you have probably noticed a few parenting experts who are promoting allowing your children to be bored this summer. You understand it’s in their best interest, but it sounds like a formula for disaster. Isn’t it ultimately in their best interest to keep them in structured activities to keep them out of trouble?
Boredom gives children and teens room to rest, to be creative, to process everything they have been learning, to think about big ideas like God and Christianity, to discover their gifts and passions, to read, to study scripture, to pray and more. Your kids need a break from being over scheduled. Their lives will not be ruined by taking off one summer from structured activities. Thankfully, you can add just a bit of structure to their summer of boredom to keep them engaged in positive activities and out of trouble.
Here are some guidelines for your summer of boredom. (Note: If you and your spouse work full time, you can give these instructions to an in-home care giver or do these things at night, on weekends or on your vacation.)
- Severely limit phone and screen time. This will be the hardest part if they are addicted. It will take two weeks of possibly miserable detox until they accept it. Phones should be used for no more than an hour a day. (If parents also detox it works better.) Admit it will be tough, but that it is in their best interest.
- Set parameters. Do you want them to stay on your property? Do they need to go to bed by a certain time? What types of things to they need to ask your permission to do?
- Make a family bucket list for the summer. What are some things you want to do as a family this summer? Aim for at least one ”adventure” a week. These can be free, but should be done as a family. (Don’t forget things like “pj day” “breakfast for supper” and other classics!)
- Record a list of all of the fun things your kids can do. Don’t get too specific. For example, write down “art” rather than a very specific art project. If they really struggle, you can print off lists of art project or other ideas that contain numerous ideas from which they can choose.
- Provide needed items. Your kids aren’t going to read if they don’t have access to interesting books or do art if they can’t find the supplies around your house. You don’t have to spend a ton of money (the public library has tons of books), but boredom summers often fail because the kids don’t have access to what they need to do something more productive.
- Be available and engaged. Creativity means they may need questions answered or advice. Encourage them to problem solve by asking questions to guide them rather than merely telling them what to do. If you don’t get aggravated every time they want to engage with you, you may also find your relationship is strengthened.
- Encourage daily or weekly service to others. This can be done individually and/or as a family. Our website has dozens of great service project ideas. http://teachonereachone.org/activity-ideas/
- Encourage Bible study and prayer. Once again, this can be done independently or as a family. If you expect them to study on their own, help them choose a prepared study for their age group to help.
- Encourage learning a new skill. Maybe they want you to teach them to cook their favorite dishes. Or you need to teach them how to do laundry or change a tire. Lots of craft and hobby stores have short term lessons for kids and teens.
- Allow naps and occasional movie watching. Your kids are probably sleep deprived. Even if they won’t nap, on an extremely hot or rainy afternoon a movie online can force them to rest a bit. (Try to limit movies to no more than once every week or so.)
- Encourage time outdoors exercising. Some kids are indoor kids and would never go outside and exercise if they could. Their moods and health will be better if they spend a lot of time outdoors and play or even walk or swim. They can even take their books and activities outside if it’s possible in your neighborhood.
- Allow day dreaming. Staring at the clouds or stars has a purpose. It provides peace and quiet for processing, thinking, dreaming. Give your kids that gift.
- Encourage them to entertain friends. Hospitality is a key element of families who raise active, productive Christians. Help them plan the activities they will do with their friends when they come over. Don’t forget old classics like board games when it gets super hot or rainy.
- Make a chore jar. Experienced moms know that nothing cures boredom like a chore. If they whine or break the parameters or rules, allow them the privilege of choosing a job from the jar. These tasks should be above and beyond their normal chores and just annoying enough to encourage them to do something other than whine so they won’t have to choose from the chore jar!
Give your kids the gift of boredom this summer. Just structure it a bit so it makes this your best summer ever!